The Spirit Level - Listening

Perhaps the greatest barrier to worthwhile communication is that we no longer listen to understand. We listen only to reply. Our ears twitch, our tongues prepare their retorts, and before the sentence has even ended, we are already halfway into our counterpoint. What passes for dialogue is often little more than a polite duel to get one’s point across and be heard.

But what if listening was something else? If we approached each other’s words with kinder curiosity, the intent to respond would quickly dissolve. We would notice not only what was said, but what trembled just behind it — the hesitation, the vulnerability, the unspoken plea for recognition. There is music in pauses, meaning in silences, whole chapters in a sigh.

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